The greatest gift in my life as a person, a wife, a mother, and a friend is intercession. CS Lewis says “Pain insists upon being attended to. God whispers to us in our pleasures, speaks in our consciences, but shouts in our pains. It is his megaphone to rouse a deaf world.” If you are a person, it is inevitable; you know pain.
If you have ever birthed a child, you know pain. If you have every carried a friend’s burden, you know pain. If you have ever had a loved one pass on from this life, you know pain. If you have ever really lived, you know pain.
Pain is often part of our process. Not always, but often. And, unfortunately, many of us haven’t been given many tools to understand pain. We find a myriad of “treatments” to numb it, pill pop it, pass by it, or drink it down. This is a detriment to our culture. A detriment to our children, to our families, to our livelihood.
Ever since Ella was born, I’ve been on a journey to express trapped pain in my body. Because of my sensitive nature, I have a predisposition to absorb every environment I walk into. Not only did I have my own life experiences and traumas to work through, but I also carried the experiences and traumas of others that I encountered. Some call it empathy, some call it hypersentivity, some call it prophetic intercession, some call it psychic abilities. What it is for sure is absorption, and many people are wired this way. Especially women!
What I learned after Ella was born was that I needed outlets to release all of the absorbed energies my body was manifesting. I started having issues with my thyroid, kidney stones, nervous exhaustion among other things. It was the beginning stages of the birthing of my life’s real voice. Just like I had given birth with each child that came into my womb and also left, I was also filled with more and more energy to disperse. But before it turned into positive energy, it showed up as anxiety. When I became touched by new life, I became more and more inspired. And the more inspired I became, the more I needed release. Without the release, the emotions that were tapped into would cause me to grow toxic inside. And that was and is always my cue to create.
When inspiration strikes and emotions are triggered, it’s the perfect time for processing. And often times, it’s the process of pain (can we say childbirth?) that propels us into real life.
It seems that because of our day in age and our ability to communicate with many people in one day (social media) as well as the great opportunity for freedom of expression, many people are in this phase of needed release. The only problem with this is that many people don’t process their pain before they express their voice, and it actually causes more harmful results to be triggered.
This has propelled the mommy wars, the vaccination fights, the political mumbo jumbo, and all the childish behavior that is overtly overtaking our forms of communication. In all reality, it’s really sad because we have such great tools to make a difference in each other’s lives, and instead it often feels like stones are being thrown everywhere. In my opinion, we need to laugh more! We need more things to be joyful about; which means, we need to be intentional about our personal processes!
What I’ve learned as I’ve processed my own pain is this: it takes inside work to have outside results. If we’re inspired and/or triggered by something, whether it be online or with our spouses or kids or job, it is a gift. It might not always seem like a gift at the time (because sometimes inspiration requires change), but it is. It is an opportunity to awaken, to look inside and find out what needs expressed. If we are inspired by something we find joyful, this is usually easy. If we are awakened by something that triggers our pain or insecurities, it can be a bit more work. In this case, our first response is often the blame game. The blame game is actually the WORST possible result for a triggered emotion. If we want to influence anyone or anything, it always starts with inside work. If we need to bring correction or perspective to a situation, it starts with inside work. So many of our attempts at expressing ourselves have become swords to chop each other into pieces. And when this happens, we have dug our own grave. There is little planted correction in the tone of an impure voice.
The power in freedom of expression is humility, surrender, and validation. We are each trying to fill gaps in society in some form, I hope! But in order to fill others’ gaps, we start with our own. This is why I love intercession! When I learn how to submit myself into prayer, I receive the grace I need to close my gap. When my gap is filled, I have excess grace to give someone else. This excess grace can then be translated in conversation and transformation (even when that conversation is a difficult one). The most wonderful part of this is that after emotional pain has been released, control and fear are thrown out the window. When we’re done trying to control one another’s behavior, we are actually free to love one another. And it’s in this place of respect that we can make healthy movement forward.
The interesting part of this process is that everyone is in their own unique process! This means that my path might not look like another’s person’s path. I’m working on closing my own gap; I’m not comparing my gap to someone else’s, and I’m not trying to fix anyone else’s gap. I also work on the inside from a place of humility (because I have baggage as much as anyone else), so I don’t feel a need to judge anyone else’s gap. When I’m free from judgement, I have the perfect platform to share my perspective. When I’ve shared my perspective, it may bring course correction. And if so, that is REAL LIFE! Then I’ve contributed in a healthy way, I’ve helped carry a burden, and I’ve helped cover a wound. I’ve interceded. I’ve been part of a solution. This is how we transform harmful pain into productive pain; and once we’ve mastered this, we start to build muscle. And this muscle can be used to support many others.
I’ll be writing a few more blogs in the next few weeks about some personal steps we can individually take to do our own gap-closing. I’ll talk about boundaries, forgiveness, and using our voices well. If you want me to write about anything specific, please let me know. I’m hoping it clears a path for new creativity and new life! I’ve enjoyed finding these tools through much trial and error, and I’m really enjoying watching my Lifecoach clients and friends succeed with them as well!
More coming soon………-Share this page- Tweet